11-18-09 Philippians 3 - 4

I am trying to have an OT quick review, instead of getting into commentaries for the book to slow me down. But sooner or later, I will have to get a creditable commentary to study. This book, with other books, is just so amazing, encouraging, uplifting, full of wisdom and applications, and consistent in theology. Amazing grace from God to Apostle Paul.

Couple of points in those two chapters:
1. 3:12 - "I press on to make it my own" -- not make salvation on my own, but making the idea of "righteousness from God that depends on faith" as part of my life, making it an automatic reaction, making it part of my flesh.
2. 3:13 - "forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of upward call of God in Christ Jesus" -- Do not let your past stop you, not ignore it, but seize opportunity to go forward for the mission of Christ Jesus.
3. 3:20 - "our citizenship is in heaven" -- what else do I need to say, but to consistently remind myself about this verse. Today, I read a heart wranching journal about little three-year old Malachi Smith (who died from Leukemia) written by his mom. What a great assurance that Lord is in Heaven and he planned it all. And our citizenship is with him.
4. 4: 4-7 - "Rejoice.... don not be anxious about anything...." Amazing Grace. Wow. Lord, thank you for this great assurance and consultation and direction.
5: 4:8 six Whatevers and two Ifs
6: 4:11 - Paul learned to be content in every situation. and he asked Philippians to "join in imitating me" in 3:17.

11-13-09 Philippians 1 & 2

Six points impacted me:
1. Paul's passions to be a servant of God and Christ. He is not afraid of death. As a matter of fact, death itself does not even affect his decisions and his work. Either way, he accepted God's will and plan for him.
2. 2:3 - Do nothing from RIVALRY or conceit, but in HUMILITY count others more significant than yourselves. Exam my own heart, where is rivalry (thinking I need to accomplish certain things to be in par with my peers) and humility (I regard others more significant than me due to fear of men, fake humility and pride). More significant than yourselves - others forward, me step backward.
3. Paul is such a great writer. Those writings got be Spirit's work -- they are so consist with other three books (Ephesians, Galatians, and Colossians).
4. Timothy and Epaphroditus - Praiseworthy laborers for the Lord.
5. 1:6- He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ - God completes the work all the way until your perfection (your death or Lord's coming). There are a lot of work and they are continuous.
6. 1:27 - "... striving side by side for the faith of the gospel" - side by side, great picture of racing and striving forward.

Blogging more

I am looking forward to doing more journaling. This will be one way my son gets to know me when he grows up. I love him much.

Car Loan - September 7, 2009

I shall always remember this day as a day of shame for incurring new car loan of $19,186.74 for 60 months, even though I knew the consequence of this action. This shall never happen again and I shall pay off this loan as soon as possible with all my power!!!

GM and Leslie Cheung

GM- A day of change! Truly as President Obama pleaded, he needed changes. So much changes that for the first time a President of United States dictated the business affairs of a private company. Truly a change that he would be running the business from White House. Even though he was not a majority shareholder, he can change the CEO of a company just like that. Even though he was not a majority shareholder, he can decide what type of cars GM should keep and what type of business GM should do in the future. What a commie.

April 1 -- Anniversary of Leslie Cheung's death. Talented artist/singer. Grow up listening his song. The tragic is I would not hear him up there in the Heaven.

Day 89

When it rains, it pours. That is how I felt my Lord shows His blessings. I am grateful. But I am fearful that I will make wrong decisions. I know prayers and meditations help. But I know how to pray, not how to meditate.

Today, I got up early and went to Universal Studio to complete the skill assessment test offered by IndyMac. I am going to work for IndyMac as a contract consultant next Wed. Good pay. But I would not be able to go to China. Even when I was taking the test, another phone call came that offered me another position with Boeing. Woow. What a blessing. But what a difficult choice. I know the result of the choice, but I am not good at saying no to people. People pleaser!

Today my wife and I are having a fight -- not too sure what yet.

Last night I had a difficult phone call with mom and Ronnie. That dragged my spirit down.

I learned today the proper theological paradigm of one's approach to a holy God: redemption, morality and worship. Redemption results in morality, which in turn ensures a proper worship of God. It is the sequence followed by the Book of Exdous. Ch. 1-18 is redemption; Ch.19-24 is morality and Ch.25 - 40 is proper worship (except the golden calf). I really enjoyed reading the book of "Yesterday, Today and Forever - the Continuing Relevance of the Old Testament" by Larry R. Helyer.

Day 88

Another day. Since receiving the offer from UCLA, Cristen and I tried to figure out whether we need to make counter-offer, just like you do with other business. We were advised by John Dahl not to do so. But I needed to give UCLA a chance to say no or yes. Anyway, I sent an email to ask for possible pay increase. I got it last night. No was the loud and clear answer. Well, it is what it is. I took the offer and planned to start on Dec. 3. Meanwhile, I was thinking I could take a trip to China with Cristen. This was great!. NOT SO QUICK! Lord said. Today, He told us No.

Minutes after I sent the acceptance email, one of the recruiter I worked with called with a temporary assignment with a month long length. How can I refuse work God gave to me? It was a good pay, and it was what I needed - a work. I could not tell Cristen why I needed to go to China, except wanting a vacation. So I guess God is making another decision for us. It was a hard one. Tomorrow morning, I have to take "capability assessment test" at Universal City. Human is so stupid -- when we don't have, we are discontent. When we are finally given, we are confused with choice we have, become greed and not thanking the Lord for all that are provided. Our Lord is so merciful, gracious, and wonderful. What a Provider He is! Looking back last 88 days, I wonder how many times I fail HIM. I knew I did it, Cristen Knew, and everyone else does as well. What kind of Christian I am? Lord, please forgive this discontent, ungrateful sinner!

I had a good session with Keith. We did not get too far. I needed to be more prepared. Additionally, I have to figure out another way to continue the session while I start working.

I did not like Biblical Counseling class too much. I know it is my fault, but I cannot figure out a way to stimulate my interest of those classes. Lord help me.